Some of those people leave as a result of totally avoidable mistakes we’ve made when writing the sales page. The point being, you can’t write a good sales page if you’re writing it to the wrong person. Make sure you know who you’re writing to. Conversion Killer #2: You ask the wrong question before you start As a young copywriter, I used to focus most of my attention on how I was going to craft my message. Sometimes I’ll read copy that has an overly long list of benefits. They’re all good benefits, but the list is just way too long. Two things happen when the list is too long. If it is, make a note to always review the last few lines of every sales page you write. Conversion Killer #5: You sound like a salesperson When we come across sales language that sounds pushy, our defenses go up. While pushy sales language puts people off and makes them feel defensive, conversational language is disarming and makes them feel safe.
A sales page lies at the end of the conversion path.
When a prospect arrives on that page, it’s the result of a lot of planning and hard work.
So the next part really sucks.
Because most of those visitors will leave the page without buying anything.
Fortunately — a small silver lining — there are ways to reduce the number of leavers. Some of those people leave as a result of totally avoidable mistakes we’ve made when writing the sales page.
Let’s go through five of these mistakes, one by one, and figure out how to correct them.
Conversion Killer #1: You write to the wrong person
Sometimes this means you’re writing to totally the wrong person.
For example, if you’re selling a family car, you might assume you should be writing to “dad.” But you’re not taking into consideration a recent study that shows 82 percent of moms have the final say in which car they finally buy.
So if you’re writing just to dad, you’re making a big mistake.
The same can happen in B2B. You think you’re selling to person A, but it’s person B who has the final say. Or maybe the decision goes to committee.
The point being, you can’t write a good sales page if you’re writing it to the wrong person.
How to fix it
Make sure you know who you’re writing to. And then do a ton more research until you feel you really know that person.
Conversion Killer #2: You ask the wrong question before you start
As a young copywriter, I used to focus most of my attention on how I was going to craft my message.
Hey, I was an enthusiastic young thing, anxious to show off how well I could write! I wanted to write amazing, clever headlines and copy.
After a few years I finally figured out I was starting in the wrong place.
How I wrote the copy wouldn’t help if I hadn’t first figured out what to say.
You can’t write the wrong message well! (Actually, you can. But it won’t do you any good.)
How to fix it
Finally, I figured out that asking, “What should I say?” was a much better starting point than, “How should I say it?”
Then, decades later — because I’m a slow learner — I finally figured out an even better question.
“What does my prospect want to hear?”
That’s really the only question you need to ask. And it circles back to Conversion Killer #1. Because you have no hope of knowing what your prospect wants to hear unless you first have a deep understanding of who they are.
Once you focus on what your prospect wants to hear, your task as a copywriter becomes embarrassingly simple.
Conversion Killer #3: You list too many benefits
As a junior copywriter, you quickly learned it’s better to talk about a product’s benefits than its features.