‘Twas the Night Before My Social Media Detox. ’Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even my mouse. The videos were nestled all snug in their embeds, While visions of view counts danced in my head. I’d shut down my laptop and closed my inbox To settle my brain for a social detox. When out on the feeds there arose such a chatter, I sprang from the bed to see what’s the matter. When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, But talk of an error I’d made writing “we’re.” With a little apostrophe, simply misplaced, I knew in a moment the challenge I faced. They tweeted, and @-ed, and called me by name. A monkey could do it, just sending a tweet! So over to Google my fingertips flew, To hastily ask what on Earth I should do. Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night.”
’Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even my mouse.
The tweets were all scheduled and fact-checked with care,
In hopes that some readers would still be on there.
The videos were nestled all snug in their embeds,
While visions of view counts danced in my head.
I’d shut down my laptop and closed my inbox
To settle my brain for a social detox.
When out on the feeds there arose such a chatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what’s the matter.
Away to my laptop I flew like a flash,
Tore open my browser and emptied my cache.
The light on the front of my now-open screen
Near blinded me fully and wiped my view clean.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But talk of an error I’d made writing “we’re.”
With a little apostrophe, simply misplaced,
I knew in a moment the challenge I faced.
More rapid than eagles, my haters they came.
They tweeted, and @-ed, and called me by name.
“How dare you! How could you! You made a mistake!
Fire that person! They must be a fake!
A monkey could do it, just sending…
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